The Sai Avatar on Himself

He is always there for His devotees....


I have a friend who told me that he had just returned from India, where he met Sai Baba. I told him I had never heard of Sai Baba. He went on to tell me his experience of meeting Sai Baba, who sounded very interesting. After we hung up, I had the thought, that I would love to know what Sai Baba looked like. It was just a strong thought, a heartfelt desire. I lived in Mt. Carmel, Indiana, USA. This is an extremely small farming the middle of nowhere. The next day, I walked the quarter of a mile, down the gravel lane, that divided the 144 acre farm and cow pasture where we lived, that led to our mailbox. There in the mailbox was a catalogue that I had never seen before or ordered. It was a small but thick catalogue, offering a wide variety of items for sale. Because there is not much to do in the middle of nowhere.....I turned each page of the catalogue, when almost to the very end.....lo an behold....much to my surprise - there was a picture of Sai Baba!!!! It has been almost 30 years since that day, and I am still in complete awe and thanksgiving to Beloved Sai Baba. One sincere, heartfelt thought went out from the middle of nowhere, and the very next day, I received his picture in my mailbox!!!!! What a blessing!!!! Jai Jai Sai Baba.
by- Fran Adams


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One more story


I was born in a family of Sastri to a pious astrologer and a spiritual person. Last4 generations were all astrologers and my father was the last as none of us took up that profession. A small family of one eldest sister ( more like my mother as we have an age difference of 18 years) and an elder brother (8 years age difference) the youngest, is myself. Got interested in spirituality at young age and started chanting and Sandhya vandanam( Daily Obeisance) 3 times with pranayam gave spiritual insights and experiences at a young age. An ardent lover of Mother Form as I realized SHE LOVES me so much.
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Swami walked into my life and then everything turned upside down, perhaps , (before that it was all upside down and) HE put it back into Original position. Though I was a bal vikas student I went away from HIS form towards science and reasoning when I started my pre university. Not only Lord Ram , I also had to go through the Vanavas ( forest life for 14 loooong years). During these years HE made me experience the World and its vagaries.

Due to HIS infinite compassion that I should not stray away at the right time, He made me see all aspects of materialistic world but did not allow me to venture into it fully. I know HE was always holding the rope tied to me in HIS hand. So that I do not go away too far to a point of no return.

The journey begins …

I was 21 fresh from collage working with a Cost accountant in Delhi and happened to meet an amazing personality who was working for the Defense department an engineer by qualification and a true yogi by life style. He was doing agnihotram ( obeisance to fire) three times and cooking his own food and would never touch anything others offer (except water). He was around 29 -30 years of age, with eyes glowing like 500 watts bulb, emanating peace and love.
A casual statement by him that you are born in a Brahmin family & a blessed one should do at least Gayatri Japa, (recitaion of the Gayathri manthra) ignited the spark from the slumber. The next day I started doing Gayatri, then a week later sandhya vandanam and then started aditya hrudayam( worship of Sun God), Vishnu sahasranamam (1008 names of Lord Vishnu), lalitha sahasranamam (1008 names of Mother Goddess)….. and started a satwic diet. A week later on a full moon night was lying on the terrace and was enjoying the beauty of the full moon. Suddenly a surge of waves formed in my stomach and started spreading all over my body lifting me up to a different realm.
My first experience of a taste of spirituality started thus. The year ahead gave me blissful experiences and was not able to concentrate on work.

The urge to leave everything and go to solitude was so great a fear enveloped me thinking about my sisters family, my fathers financial position etc. Perhaps the Divine Mother wanted me to have a break , without any guidance , the fear succeeded and I stopped one by one all practices and was pushed back into the world.. This time the repercussions were bad as all the darker side of the world swept me by my feet. Started smoking, drinking. Life's turn took me to different places and my father’s death in 1987 brought me back to my native place. I was forced to stay there as a support for my sister and I took up my first job as a sales trainee in a computer company.

1990 Chennai Junction
Moved to Chennai in 1990 and started a new life there. Got married in 1991 and sort of settled down in life. The call came as usual with a difficulty in office situation. As a sales person the expected strike rate is 25% and if one has 100 qualified prospect one will end up closing 25 sales. But in my case all 100 withered away and was left in the lurch. I had to face the ultimatum on Monday in office and my colleague called me to attend the bhajan at Sundaram ( Swamy’s residence in Madras on Sunday.

My big EGO told me that there is nothing wrong to go as I used to attend Balvikas as a child. I chose to visit Sundaram ( perhaps Bhagwan pushed to me to take even that first step). They sang Ambe Janani Abhirami (bhajan) and it pierced my self ( soul) and felt like crying the whole night. Monday I went to office and I had 7 enquiries and I closed all 7 of them to sales and rest is history.
In 1991 November 23rd a friend of mine was celebrating Swami's Birthday and wanted me to go and help him. Went there the previous night and helped him to set the altar and other decorations. The friend of mine wanted me to sing a bhajan for the nagar sankeertan and that gave me enormous tension instead of pleasure as you all would expect. I lost touch with singing bhajan and I knew no bhajan. But GOD was kind enough to spare me that morning as HE knew my plight. After all the celebrations were over we were sitting and chatting they forced me to sing something.

I sang a tamil devotional song by DR K.J Yesudas and everyone said you have a voice which stirs the soul hence I should learn and sing a bhajan in the evening. I listened to Sundaram cassette and came across Hey ramba janani sung by brother Devanathan ( a popular melodious bhajan singer ) I didn't know his name then, which touched the core of myself. I attempted that song the same evening and I murdered that song so badly that I never wanted to sing bhajans. I presume it is Swami who made me go to Sundaram and buy myself the first cassette. I started listening to bhajans. But only when I didn't have any other work I would go to Sundaram.

1992 December 25th went to native place to perform the function for the first child birth scheduled on 28th morning. The previous evening was the bash for the old chums and was high "spirits" came back home at midnight and was in 7th heaven. For the first time Swami appeared ( not sure a dream or a vision) and said " If you want ME to LOVE you then you will have to change your life style" .

I said YOU are supposed to be GOD and YOU want me to change , Change me , I am a normal human being and I don't think I can change. This historical event ended with that conversation but the ever compassionate, ever LOVING LORD willed to change me. Next day I woke up as a new person without any urge to smoke . HE had taken away every bad habits I acquired somewhere during my journey this life. After the function I left for Chennai by train and I have travelled n number of times in my life and for the first time in my life I was surrounded by people in my coach ended by talking about Baba along the journey. From then he ensured that I was surrounded by them. I thought only GOD is Omni Present but I realized HIS devotees are equally Omni Present. January 1993 there was a news that Swami might visit Chennai. So I did not want to miss that first time opportunity of seeing him in Flesh. Went to a shop and bought a camera to capture HIM for posterity. HE did elude everyone on the specified date and arrived 3 days later. I was returning back from work and I got an urge to go through Pughs road. When I landed near Pughs road there were sevadals standing there and they said Swami has arrived. I threw my Yamaha bike and ran to Sundaram. Everyone said HE just finished Darshan and went inside. I was thoroughly disappointed as HE was eluding me. Told HIM tomorrow morning I will come for suprabatham & nagara sankeerthan and left for home.

Never seen 3 AM in my life hence told my mother to wake me up at 3.30 so that I can go for Darshan. But HE made me get up at 2.30 and I was ready by 3.0 AM. Took my bike and started towards Sundaram ….. the empty road, the chillness of January mist (Markazhi), a little drizzle the previous evening all that gave special effects. Suddenly the evil EGO send a thought that perhaps I will be first one to arrive. Put my bike in Sundaram finance and entered Pughs road already there were thousands sitting in line. I felt a slap on my face and I apologised to Baba for that thought. Kept talking to him mentally and at 4.30 they left us in to Sundaram for suprabatham. When my turn came they said it is full. Sorry. I said in my mind Swami without YOUR WILL I cannot come here I already apologised for that thought why don't YOU forgive me? The moment this thought crossed my mind the seva dal said one person “Sai ram“and let me in and led me to the front row. Had a wonderful suprabatham, nagarsankeerthan and saw Swami for the first time in Flesh VISHWA ROOPA DARSHAN ( cosmic form ). HE just swallowed me by HIS sheer beauty.

Wanted to take HIS photo like any other new entrant and was not satisfied with long shots. Evening after office was talking to colleagues and at 6.30 felt an urge to go home through Sundaram. Landed there and the sevadal said expecting Swami any time. I parked my bike and stood behind the barricade right opposite Sundaram gate. The sevadal said “ Sairam Swami will get down inside Sundaram and may or may not come outside for Darshan”. I talked to Swami mentally and said " Swami I am not satisfied with long shot photographs. Give me a chance to take a close up photo of YOURS. Exactly after 10 minutes HE arrived and the car turned inside Sundaram and it stopped at the gate and my heart too stopped for a moment.

HE got down at point blank blessing with Abhaya hastha. I chose to click some close up shots. I was in heavens and the next day I realised I prayed to Swami to allow me to "take" some close up shots and HE did allow me but none of the snaps came out. Everything was dark. One has to be careful and clear when praying to our dear Lord.

After that disappointing episode of snaps not coming I got a thought that I must write a letter to the LORD. Wrote a letter in the evening and went to Sundaram in the evening at 7 p.m. The previous day crowd of 200 must have gone and told 10 people each and there were 2000 people waiting there. But the divine drama unfolded there by me getting a seat next to the gate. Was praying and talking to Him while waiting and HE came after half an hour that day Swami got down a little before the Sundaram gate and came blessing the crowd. HE was taking letters and people were trying to reach HIM above my head. I mentally told Him that unless you ask me I am not going to give it.

He then crossed me over, went to the opposite side and collected the letter and started going inside Sundaram. My mind was blank and it took some time to realise that I am going to miss a life time opportunity and I cried BABA in my mind. Like the Cow listen to the cry of the calf Swami turned and looked straight into my eyes…. My hand went inside my pocket and brought the letter out. Swami took two steps back stretched HIS hand and took the letter from the hand and HIS hand rubbing mine. He went inside and a sevadal from the crowd told me “Sairam bring chocolates tomorrow and Swami will bless”. I thought it has to be HIS Will or else why on earth the sevadal has to tell me in that crowd. I decided to bring chocolates the next day.

That after noon I went to Higginbothams a famous bookshop and bought Conversation with Hislop and Sandeha Nivarani I think. One of the question Swami had explained about belief & faith and the difference between the two. I was on top of the world at 6.30 PM itself I got ready , went to a shop bought one kilo of chocolates and rushed to Sundaram. That day the crowd multiplied in geometric progression and the whole place was full. Swami went for a dinner and came very late. I got a seat a little far off right opposite to the Sundaram gate. It was first row and it took sometime to settle down. Once I settled down I realised Swami will never make it to that place. I started scanning the place and I saw a young boy sitting with a plate of chocolates and a beautiful rose flower on top of that. I told Swami and started mentally quarrelling with Swami why He did not give me that thought of bringing a rose like that boy. But its too late now. I was praying and fighting with HIM and suddenly this thought struck me asking me to give the chocolate plate to a chubby looking boy on my side just outside the barricade right opposite to the boy with the chocolate plate with flower. So I took the help of a sevadal and passed the plate to that boy. After one hour SWAMY came , got down at the entrance of the road and came blessing the crowd. Then HE came straight to the boy who was holding my chocolate plate and put HIS hand and took handful of sweets and through it into the crowd in HIS inimitable style. Then He came near blessing and then crossed over to the opposite side and went inside Sundaram after collecting some letters. HE did not go to the other boy with the rose. Someone in the crowd said SWAMY liked only your chocolates and I started weeping un controllably and shamelessly for the first time in my life in such a huge crowd.

HE did not allow me to return to the world. Of course since my wife was away it gave me enough time for contemplation, reading HIS Glory, and HE chose to clarify all that I read against him written by self proclaimed saviours of blind faith. HE supplied the right books at the right time. I started with Autobiography of a Yogi and straightaway send money to enrol myself in kriya yoga.
Then followed by Man of Miracles, the entire series of Howard Murphet, Hislop, Don mario mazzaloni, Phillis crystal and anything by anybody about HIM.

The Director Himself had written the screen play of my life and hence it was progressing as per HIS plans. By this time attending bhajans became a routine as I had an ear for music. Started doing duty in Sundaram as a seva dal and eventually got into the Sundaram bhajan group. Swamy put me into B group in Guindy. We had Guruswamy uncle as our bhajan leader and he knew each one of our strength and weakness and he knew we will not venture into our weakness area. We had blissful period of singing in front of the Lord. In 1993 my wife delivered a baby boy and everyone expected me to name him Sai. Honestly I also thought in similar lines. However I happened to read a book then , may be Kasturi’s Loving GOD ,(mysteriously landed in my hand) where someone is in a dilemma to name the child Sai and realizes the problems when the child grows up people calling him (dey) or (abhey) in singular and sometimes using bad words in school or college would not be appropriate as Mother Sai is in flesh among us. So I named him Pranav instead.

We decided to go to Parthi for his first birthday. So we went to Parthi with my mother and in-laws on 12 th of Feb I think. It was his star birthday the next morning and we were shopping outside Prasanthi. Someone was staring at me and I felt very uncomfortable. Then that man crossed over and came to me and said “ Sairam Swamy wants me to give you this picture and vibhuti” . He gave a picture of Swamy where it was written Sai Christ of Canada on the reverse side with SWAMY’ s blessing posture. I thanked him and explained why we were there. I was telling SWAMY in my mind that is this the only blessing YOU have planned for me or YOU are going to bless the child tomorrow? I have come all the way without doing any Ayush homam ( a haven performed in the first year for longevity) for the child. So please BABA do not let me down.

The next morning we got ready and made the child ready at 4 clock and walked towards Darshan line. I was carrying my son and when I reached the lines had already formed. So closed my eyes and prayed to SWAMY please guide me wchich row to sit?. I got a thought and went to the row my heart told me . Pranav was sleeping on my lap and when they allowed the crowd in side for Darshan I saw one by one lines started going in. I was restless and asked the small boy what s the token no? He showed me the token and I was about to hit the sand seeing the token no 25. That was the last line. My heart sank in gloom.

I did not know what to do so I kept praying and took the child and went in with a plate of chocolates. The whole place was packed.Those days there used to be a semi rectangular shape covered portion at the back in open Darshan hall where the staff used to sit. I explained my position to a person and he gracefully allowed me to sit next to him though only staff was allowed to sit there. It took me some time to relate to the surroundings.

It was a difficult place for SWAMY to come for Darshan as it was quite far and it dawned on me only after 20 minutes that sevadals were sitting right opposite for special Darshan after their 2 weeks duty. So there was a possibility for HIM to come.

At exactly 6.40 the LORD came gliding down and I was showing Pranav SWAMY and he was looking at the book in my lap and was saying BABA, Baba. The sevadals were quite considerate and did not asked me to take the child away as he was talking. After finishing the Darshan SWAMY went to the sevadals for granting them Padanamaskar and my heart started beating like huge drums .
I took the chocolate plate in my hand and was trying to be calm praying. He finished the special darshan and started walking back towards the interview room. My heart beat stopped. Pranav was standing on my lap and he has been silent since 4.30 AM and suddenly he screamed as if it was a cry of the soul as the LORD ignored him. The sevadals went panicky and the most un expected ( expected) thing happened. SWAMY turned and looked at Pranav ( I was holding the plate of chocolate) and HE started walking towards us. The heart jumped in joy out of emotion. HE came straight to us and words as usual failed me and I meekly said “SWAMY – first Birthday” . He took the chocolate from the tray opened the chocolate and put it in Pranav’s mouth saying “theesko” and blessed Pranav. '

1994 -1997
Quantum shift

Turn of events took me from hand to mouth existence to a comfortable financial freedom in a span of 3 years but not with out test and trials. Got a nice job in Sterling Holiday Resorts and thought I settled down. But the day I completed the probation in office, I knew little that I have to go through a major test in life. I came back from a month end party late night and got up in the wee hours with heavy vomiting and loose motion. Next day the situation continued and became totally drained off. But I was singing bhajans right through though was not well and did not attend office. The next day started feeling numb on the right side of the cheeks and no sensation in the right side of the tongue or teeth. Started getting a split vision seeing every object as two (vertical diplopia ). Got admitted into a nearby hospital. They put me through observation and ophthalmologist came and tested. Next morning I started loosing equilibrium and started to fall towards one side when I walked. Meanwhile my office colleagues came to know and my Asst Vice President came to see me in the hospital. Seeing my plight the office decided to shift me into a better hospital and shifted me into Chennai Kaliappa hospital. As we were entering the hospital one car came out and in the front glass a picture of Bhagwan in Abhayahastham ( Blessing Posture) was welcoming me. I knew HE was there for me and the thought that the hospital was closer to Sundaram the Chennai residence of Swami gave me courage to face the test.

They made many test and the Neuro physician instructed not to walk even for toilet. After 3 days of hospitalization 4 th day was fixed for caroted angiogram. It was in the hospital that I learnt , they suspect a brain haemorrhage or tumor or something. Also the doctor was narrating what angiogram is all about and sometime the patient may die while doing this test etc to a colleague of mine. I was prepared to leave as I learnt I am not the performer and HE will be in control of my family. I told “Swamy, you have revealed to me now about your presence and given me an opportunity to play whatever role in Your Mission. Hence if you extend my lease I can work towards becoming a better devotee in this life time itself.” Perhaps Swamy then decided to extend my lease. The angiogram revealed no blockages or leak but a haemoragic edema as the doctors called it. Was in the hospital for 15 days under medication. Vibhuti came from all directions and Ambika aunty, a close devotee (she used to play with Swami in childhood) brought vibhuti from Swami from Parthi. She also got a hand kerchief blessed by Swami for my protection and health. My wife Jayanthy with 18 month old son Pranav , was perplexed as she did not realize what was happening in my (her ) life? . Only solace was my very close friend, more like a brother , Suresh Kumar who was coming and praying for me. I must share that Suresh was and is with us through our thick and thin.

After 18 days I was discharged as miraculously my brain responded for some tablet and hence an operation under consideration was cancelled. I was advised bed rest for two months and finally came home in ambulance (luckily not in a box). Many prayers were answered by Swamy. For the first time throughout this ordeal HE came in my dream and asked how is my head caressing my head. I remember telling HIM I have no worry as YOU are there. Then the most compassionate Lord
started visiting me in dreams almost daily as an assurance and affirmation. This episode changed my perception of life and the priorities in life. After I came out of this situation HE put me through to Pranic healing, Sai Sanjeevani healing, Spiritual healing and made me a worthy instrument of HIS healing energy. Witnessed many healing sessions.

This was the time Sri Ra Ganapathy ( a karma yogi, naishtika brahmachari & the author of many books including Baba Sathya Sai ) was staying with Mr Suresh Kumar and I was blessed by his visit home one night and he ordered me to get up and sit. He said you are perfectly healthy. Go to Shirdi Baba temple in VGP and have darshan of Sai. Every thing will be alright. That paved the way for my health to bounce back. I started practising Pranic healing and Sai Sanjeevani healing. Things again started moving in the right direction. In 1997 we went on a trip to Hrishikesh and Haridwar visiting many holy places. First time in my life saw a mercury shivlingam in haridwar (mercury melts in room temperature) and a rudraksh tree ( it normally grows in sub zero temperature). An interesting episode was about to unfold in Haridwar which I did not realize while arriving at Haridwar.

While the train was entering the railway station I was glancing outside and saw a hotel which attracted my attention and wanted to stay there. But it was a little far off from the railway station. But when we got down at the station we were troubled

by a man who wanted to earn some money so insisted he will carry our luggage So though it was not heavy and I could manage myself I took his help. Before I could say anything he took us to a hotel just opposite the railway station and put our luggage without listening to my protest or instruction to go to the hotel I saw before entering the city. My wife said its okay so we checked into that hotel to my dislike.

 They also cheated by asking double the fare as next day or so was special new moon day and millions are assembling in Haridwar to take a holy dip in the Ganges. So no rooms will be available he said. The rooms were not bright and the mattress and the comforter were old and it was suffocating. I prayed to SWAMY and accepted HIS WILL as always HIS WILL prevails. Somehow we slept off as we were tired coming from Mussourie. The next morning we got ready and joined a group leaving for Haridwar and Rishikesh tour. We went to many ashrams and we were to be back by 3 pm to the hotel as our train to Delhi was at 4.30. The Shadabdi Express a super fast limited stop express starts from Dehradun at 4 PM and arrives Haridwar at around 4.30 which we were suppose to board. However at 4 PM we were struck in Haridwar near Ganga ashram quite far off from the hotel as there were traffic diversions due to sea of humanity already in Haridwar for the auspicious day. Somehow the tour operator caught a 3 wheeler and put us in that. My wife was tense and was talking in a loud voice in frustration as she was not sure whether we will be able to catch the train. SWAMY gave me the strength to tell her that leave it to SWAMY. If it is HIS WILL that we will catch the train then we will, otherwise not. I kept praying as I did not carry enough cash. The auto could not travel beyond a point and from there we shifted in to a tri cycle. It was already 4.25 pm.
The old man pushed the cycle and we were all sweating , pulse increasing like drum beats mentally chanting Sairam, Sairam. Somehow we reached the hotel at 4.35 PM. I went to the reception to settle the bill and asked for the luggage, the answer was “we thought you will take some rest so we did not vacate your room”. So rushed to the room collected all baggage and rushed down. Settled the bill and ran to the station across with all the luggage. IT was 4.50 PM. Ran ……. Straight in to the station and to the platform and saw no train there. The platform was sort of empty. Felt like crying. Mustering courage went and asked a person about Shadabdi to Delhi and he said don’t know why its still not arrived today. I knew why and thanked my sweet LORD from the bottom of my heart. Exactly after two minutes the train enters the platform and we boarded the train for New Delhi. I was imagining if we had taken the hotel we first saw ( we cannot see what is coming on our way but our Sweet SWAMY can kalaya namaha, kala atheethaya namaha) we would not have made it to the station or may be our Lord would have to do something more perhaps .

Visiting Yogi Ramsurat Kumar of Thiruvannamalai. My friend Suresh Kumar had to visit Thiruvannamalai as instructed by Shri. Ra Ganapathi and so I joined along with my wife and son. I prayed as usual SWAMY all names and forms are YOU. Grant me Darshan , Sparshan and Sambashan. We were summoned by YOGI for an interview and we performed half an hour Sai Bhajan in HIS presence. HE did grant my prayers of Darshan, Sparshan and Sambashan. We had a blissful interview for 90 minutes. Suresh asked me to join him in taking Arthi to HIM so got that once in a life time opportunity.

1997 to 1999 March

I joined my a friend of mine to market Sathya Sai Village Resort in Puttparthi to market it as a time share after resigning from Sterling Resorts. I still remember the journey to Kodaikanal in April to seek Swamy's blessings to take up the project. We arrived in Kodai and took a cottage in Sterling were my friend had a cottage as Property Time Share. We went to Darshan in the morning and I wrote a letter telling
Swamy that HE must accept the letter only if HE wants me to take up the project. After 1 hour Swamy came gliding down the steps and my heart started beating fast Sai … Ram Sai… Ram. There HE was on the opposite line taking letters and blessing people. He almost crossed over me leaving me behind. My heart almost stopped and I was calling HIM in my mind and suddenly Swamy turned and walked back crossing over to my place and took the letter. I was very happy ad we discussed the Darshan the whole day. Still I was not satisfied. I was asking HIM for re affirmation of HIS acceptance of this project. Next Darshan I got the second row and I was praying to HIM and waited for HIM eagerly as the clock was ticking very very slow. Then HE came floating and HE stopped right in front of me to talk to someone behind and I bent down to hold HIS feet and kissed HIS soft silky feet. Manuva Sada Bhajore Gurucharanam … dustara bhava sagara tharanam. So I was happy that Swamy accepted our taking up the project and we wanted to pack up and leave for Chennai. We came back to the room and packed everything and by 3 PM we left Kodaikanal. When we were crossing Swamy’s residence we had a small yearning to have a Darshan of HIM and the ever compassionate LORD was there standing in the portico of the bhajan hall blessing.
Took up the project yet did not take off the way we wanted it and life was not easy. One good thing what happened in that project was meeting all Sai devotees from morning till night talking about HIS glory all the time and that becomes your job you cant ask for more. However Baba had other plans. He made me visit all the Sai centre across the country and made me meditate on HIS glory while on work. I also got opportunity to sing in most of the bhajans I attended including in Dharmakhetra in 1997 August or September. I can never forget two incidents in my life during this period. Firstly the special bhajan we organized during the Paduga pooja festival at Parthi. I was staying there in Sathya Sai Village and one of the devotee who was staying there felt very bad that he is enjoying in star comfort while other paduga members are staying inside prasanthi in the shed. So he wrote a letter to SWAMY and kept in the room alter. When he came back that evening one of the tissue Swamy wrote a reply consoling him and assuring him that comfort is a gift from HIM. So just enjoy. We organized a bhajan that evening and were in bliss. I was sitting close to the chair and could feel a sudden change in the vibration during the bhajan and my heart chakra started vibrating fast. There were two ladies sitting next to me sang Partheeshwara sathya saieeshwara and they sang with such karnatic tinge I was wondering who it was as their voice was very familiar. I learnt what is humility when they told me they are known as Bombay sisters at the end of the bhajan. We became friends after that.

The second incident was during the first ever Cricket Match in Parthi. I had an earnest desire to be there for that historic event but my partner wanted to go for that so I had to stay back. He booked his ticket for himself and a friend who was working as a P.R.O at the Srilankan Embassy in Chennai. But any prayer from the depth melts the LORD and it so happened that my partner had to stay back for a meeting. So Baba gave me that chance which I have been praying for.

So we were off to Bangalore by shadabdi express and arrived in Pa rthi in the evening. We saw huge crowd coming into Parthi and it gave a festive look. Huge crowd started assembling outside the stadium ( entry was free for all) barricades were erected outside the stadium to regulate the crowd. No body was clear how things are going to be the next morning. It appeared as if it was going to be very
tough to get a pass or something of that sort. My friend ( I think his name is visweswaran, I am not sure.) said he knows a doctor inside Prashanthi and we went to his residence. But we did not get any positive response from the doctor and he said no passes or anything of that sort is been given. We felt un welcome there at that moment. We knew the doctor will be definitely be there to witness that event though he said he is busy and has to attend hospital the next day. He did not even offer a seat for us so quickly said Sairam and left that place. We did not know what to do so suddenly he remembered helping a girl from Bengal for doing a project in srilanka and her parents live in Parthi behind the bus stand. He had no address just the name of the father. We took a chance and went behind the bus stand searching for them. We searched and enquired with some people and one fellow asked us to check at a particular house. My friend went to that house and we were ringing the bell for quite some time and no body was opening the door. After sometime we said let us chuck it and we started going back. He must have taken a few steps then he slipped and fell down. A lady who was coming in the street try to help us and in that process picked up a conversation. When we told her about the family she pointed to that house where we were a moment ago and when she rang the bell the door promptly opened. Then we realized we were ringing a bell connected to the first floor where nobody lives. Then we experienced Swamy’s love from that family when they treated us with quick juice and fruits and we discussed everything like a family re union after many years. Then we realized it is already 9.15 pm and is time for dinner. We said good night and left them for dinner praying to SWAMY that HE must do something about the entry into the stadium. We were skeptical as Mr Naidu ,a good old friend , who was looking after the administration of Sathya Sai Resort himself said he is helpless. But we were sure SWAMY will do something and what HE will do we were not sure. When we arrived at Sathya Sai Village at 9.30 pm and were standing in the reception a maruti car came and stopped near us.

When people started getting down we could not believe our eyes when the last man got down. He was none other than Arjuna Ranatunga the captain of the Sri Lankan team. My friend rushed to him and shook hands introducing himself to Arjuna Ranatunga. When we expressed our desire to witness the historic event . He said he will see what he can do about it and left to see his family as they were staying in Sathya Sai Village. After 10 minutes some seva dal came in search of my friend and asked us to be ready by 4 .40 AM.

We could not believe our stars and thanked SWAMY. The whole night we could not get sleep thinking about the excitement and we impatiently waited for dawn. We kept alarm for 3 .00 and we got ready by 3. 50 in the morning. We came to the reception and we were offered breakfast along with lot of dignitaries and families of the Srilankan team. Then we were boarded in two bus carrying a VIP Pass and Mr Naidu was also in our bus. Slowly we were taken inside Prasanthi and we came and entered the stadium after they started allowing people inside. When we were getting down Mr Naidu said I can only do this much ( he claimed credit for whatever was happening) now we have to find a place in the gallery.

We said Sairam thank you so much and we saw the crowd of dignitaries and the family members were taken in a line to an enclosure. We prayed to SWAMY to allow us also as a part of the family and joined them. The heart beat was very high and I could hear mine beating in super fast rhythm as we were inching in that line. We could see a sea of humanity pouring in to the stadium from the other side. Slowly we were led to a gallery with shade and they were looking at the face and letting us in one by one. My heart started beating heavily and much faster. I started once again talking and praying to SWAMY to help us. Oh my god my friend was allowed in and after two more it was my turn. My heart almost stopped and they let me in too. They stopped the person just behind me and all the people behind were re directed. We got a place along with the real VVIP's and I ended up sitting next to the ItalianAmbassador to SriLanka. Slowly after 20 minutes it dawned on me that I am sitting next to SWAMY on the right side of Shanthi Vedika. It was a treat to the eyes and soul to be part of the history in the making. I still cherish the whole event. Then next day the whole Srilankan team and family was called for interview by SWAMY and my friend also went along with them. He called me too to join them but heart of heart knew SWAMY will not appreciate that so resisted the temptation. He had a blissful time inside and we stayed in Parthi till New Year and returned to Chennai. To add to all these blessings SWAMY put me on to a Tamil magazine reporter and I wrote an article in English for him ( he translated that and published in Kumudam magazine under my name) about the Cricket match and the stadium and gave him the fabulous colour brochure with the picture of the golden trophy as a momento.

Then finally I resigned from that consultancy in June 1998. I was without a job and being the only earning member it was a rough patch we (me & BABA) were going through. Somehow HE chose this period to fulfill my inner most desires. So I got opportunity to do little bit of modeling assignments, acting in serials, pranic healing etc and money was coming through for sustenance. Seeing my plight my friend Mahesh told me about Kumar Baba with whom Shirdi Baba is talking in flesh and HE has ordained to install 1008 Shirdi idols at the devotees house whom HE sends and they have to worship 6 full moon days a special Pooja and after 6 months SHIRDI BABA will assume the responsibility of that house ( as if HE is not otherwise responsible) . Each Namavali ( Names) in the sahasranamam (1008 names of the Lord) has an attribute and HE will assume that attribute Mahesh said. So thought why not approach Kumar Baba for one installation ( pratishta) for my self. Mahesh said he is not sure as he took it 6 months ago and his number was 640 or so. When I approached Kumar Baba He said He has kept 108 Shirdi Baba idols in Durga pooja so I want to give you one from that. Hence you come here on Vijaya Dasami day. I thought that is the best thing which can happen. So I waited and went there on Vijaya Dasami day. When I was waiting one couple came there and when Kumar Baba opened the register ( he keeps the details of the devotees who is taking the idol as He prays for the welfare of their families), I saw the next no was 786 and I had a desire to possess that idol as it has Islamic significance. Bismillah Ur Rahiman Rahim. But Kumar Baba did not give me that idol and first He gave the idol to that couple. Heart of Heart I was disappointed as I got 787th idol.

So I got 787th idol and I went home un happy though my Shirdi Baba came home ( I learnt what desire can do to you) but I did not realize the significance and the divine play till I reached home and played the cassette. The 787 th namavali was “ Dukha (sorrow) , Daridra ( poverty) , Roga ( sickness) adeena ( etc) Bhasma Dharena Varayathe namaha.

One who removes sorrow, poverty , and sickness or ailments and burn them to ashes. I cried as what more one can ask the ever compassionate Lord. HE is going to assume responsibility to remov e all these from our life, then I do not need anything. After I took the idol my father in law also took one. Within one month since I took, 1008 installations were complete though only 140 plus installations had only happened since my friend Mahesh took it 6 months before me. I also did not realize that this was beginning of a 360º turn of life from that moment. I did 6 months pournami pooja ( full moon worship) and in 1999 as prophesied by Baba my journey to Qatar was scheduled on the 9th of March. I prayed to SWAMY that I cannot live without singing HIS glory so please do something about it and at least send one angel for my help. I did not know where on earth Doha Qatar was and was not sure of any Sai activities in this place. I landed in Qatar from Mumbai ( my maiden flight in life) on a Wednesday the 9th of march 1999 at 9.45 pm. But the LORD did not allow me to come out till it was Thursday and so I came out only at 0.45 hours on Thursday the 10th March 1999.

Purpose of Life….. a new phase begins
Went for my first bhajan in Qatar on a Ugadi day with my colleague Rajkumar . I sang my favourite bhajan Mandir mein Aao Madhava and there I met my two angels of SWAMY Dr. Malini Chandra Sekhar and Mr Chandrasekhar who is known in Doha as MC and GC. We came closer on many counts as we have similar tastes, preferences in life, same star, same master, music lovers, love for SWAMY’s work, belief in alternative therapies to name a few. In fact they became my local guardian and my whole life started revolving around them. They are instrumental in shaping my destiny and I owe to them everything what I am today.

It all started in 2000 March 21 st my dearest MC ‘s mother expired in Doha and I was in Chennai. GC asked me to go to a spiritual astrologer Dr. Durai Murugar and get my name and star etc checked according to numerology so that I can take any corrective steps to get out of some tight spots personally and professionally. So I took the advise and saw Dr Durai murugar. He gave me two stones and suggested a change in signature. So when they came to Chennai with the body on 22nd I proceeded to Madurai along with them. I showed GC & MC the stones I bought. After the 13 days function got over I came back to madras. They left for Doha. Then suddenly I received a call from Doha asking me to send three telegrams to SWAMY to protect and guide the Doha centre as there was a threat from C.I.D as religious prayers are not allowed this part then. I immediately went and send a telegram to the Lord. The next day I followed up with another telegram. Some how the third day I felt I must visit him. I put a chit and HE said yes. I asked him which train and HE said Lal bagh which was to leave in 2 hours. So I picked up some clothes and money and I rushed to the station. It was some holiday for 3 days and the offices were to re open the next day or so. The station was packed so was the platform. I was puzzled and as usual I started talking to HIM in my mind. I asked for HIS guidance which coach to take to make a journey if possible by sitting at least in the bathroom. Then the thought came to meet a particular TT and I spoke to him. He guided me to a coach and allotted a seat to travel for almost 60% of the distance as the seat has been reserved for a passenger from a faraway station. However in the course of the journey I made some friends so could travel till Bangalore with out problems.

I landed in Bangalore at 9.15 at night and boarded a bus to white field. A journey normally takes about 40 minutes latest took about 2 hours plus on that evening and I found myself helplessly standing somewhere in the white field industrial area at 11.45 as the bus was going to the last stop some where else. I was praying to SWAMY for help as at that time people near the ashram will be in 7th heaven and getting an accommodation is next to impossible. I again started talking to SWAMY and by then an auto came from nowhere and unloaded two passengers. I requested him whether he can drop me near the ashram and he said nalapathu rupa (40 ruppes) for which I agreed gladly.

I landed there and tried to speak to the sevadals for accommodation in that wee hours and he was asking me to come in the morning next day. I was trying to explain I need accommodation for this night and I am suppose to go back after the morning darshan. He was repeatedly telling the same thing politely with out much help to me and I was wondering what to do?. By then some devotees came back from the city and a sai sister wanted to go to her room as she had booking inside the room. But she was refused admission as she was suppose to take permission from the authorities to go out and come late. Then there was some exchange of words and a commotion and in that process someone woke up from opposite shop came there and it paved way for me getting a roof to sleep that night. I thanked the sevadal and SWAMY for that episode.

Next morning I got ready and went for Darshan. I prayed as usual asking SWAMY to guide me with the line. But they have already started the line and I was guided by sevadals to a particular place and I went inside Sai ramesh hall and took a seat. Then after 5 minutes I got a thought that I should move to my extreme right and so I moved my seat to the extreme right. I had two people to my right and then there was a pathway. SWAMY can come that side and just that thought gave me immense satisfaction. So I started talking to Him and started writing a letter to Him. I wrote “ SWAMY it is impossible for me to reach you but you know exactly where I am sitting. It is your instruction that I obeyed by shifting my place. Also you know that I am here only for just one darshan. So please come , take this letter and assure that you will guide us , guard us and protect us. Also give me vibuthi. After half an hour HE did come gliding all the way round and through the path way. My heart was beating Lub dub, lub dub heavily and HE was there on the opposite row blessing and talking letters.

Then suddenly HE was scanning and HE crossed over to our side. He came gliding and stretched HIS hand and I gave my letter and HE snatched it from my hand. I know my LORD will never forsake me. I didn’t get any vibuthi. But wonderful Darshan and so came out called my friends in Qatar and informed about the letter. Then I put a put a chit asking permission to leave. HE instead asked me to stay for evening bhajan darshan. So I stayed back for evening darshan and after the bhajan I left for Chennai in bliss. I didn’t know HE gave me vibuthi till I reached Oman on my way back.

I reached Oman and was staying with my Sai brother Bala in RUWI and we had a blissful time talking about SWAMY and attended bhajan and other activities. That fateful night I was introduced to a great soul Sai brother Sunil Pai. We talked a lot and in that process I took out the stones which I bought in Chennai from a astrologer / numerologist. Suddenly sunil said “look who’s here”? looking at my blue star sapphire stone. I asked him who’s there’ as I could not see what he was seeing. After sometime he showed me how to see Shirdi Sai, Sathya Sai and Prem Sai ( a jesus like image) from 3 profile in that stone. I was in tears. That was the vibuthi I got rather HE chose to give. I came back to Qatar and all the problems withered away as HE had taken the letter. Slowly things returned to normalcy.

I used to spend most of my time with my dearest friend and colleague Murali Menon and I used to share whatever little I know about SWAMY. That became a meditation for us till late evenings till 12 o clock. Slowly I saw Murali stopped taking non veg food, then a transformation happening to him. This was the time the Birthday celebrations were planned in 1999 and wanted to bring out a magazine. So I was to attend a meeting and I took a cab from my Office. I was thinking what would be the title for the magazine as GC and MC asked me to also think about the title. While traveling the title emerged in my mind (SWAMY gave ) Seek , Attain & Inspire ie to say Seek SAI , Attain SAI and then you Inspire Others . We were thrilled about this and it came out very well. That was the only volume we did but I presume that was drama of the LORD to bring us together. Then in the year 2000 , I was about to quit due to many professional problems but Dr pushed me into taking up further studies. So she said you are doing your MBA . I was not sure about my capabilities so as usual I prayed to Baba in the evening prayer about a sign that it is HIM who is motivating such a big action from me. He put a flower from the Mother Gayathri photo and I kept pressing for more signs and HE untiringly kept putting flowers till I was pushed into it.
One morning someone came to her clinic and gave her a prospectus from IGNOU an open university from India ( which she collected for somebody else) the requirements perfectly matched for my profile. They also offered semester system and very convenient one though it was very expensive. So I started my MBA course. First semester had economics and finance for manager which was very difficult for me among the 4 papers in the first semester. One Sriram ( we became very close later) joined Stan & Chart bank as head of consumer division and came to Qatar. So he said he will teach me finance. Thus SWAMY sent HIS first angel to take care of my (no… HIS) MBA. I got through that paper in the first attempt with 60% and then Sriram left for India for good. Economics I flunked but I could write it again within 2 years. Second semester I had MS 5 material management & MS 7 information technology & MS 8 Statistics and O . R. This semester was the test of time and endurance and if I am through by HIS grace then all subsequent papers were all related to my professional life. So again I prayed to HIM and surrendered to Baba to handle things for me.

Universal Chancellor One of the devotees daughter Devaki ( a Sri Lankan family – Mr and MRs Kandaswamy) was doing Computers and she offered help in computers. She taught me Cobol and PERT & CPM etc and prepared me for the exam and also solved problems for my assignments. MS 08 I had taken tuition from another friend paying money. Economics which I had arrears a friends nephew Mr Babu who is a chartered accountant , had taken up a job in Qatar and came forward to help me. He was too good in a dry subject like Economics and made it so interesting. But I could not get anyone in MS 5. So we decided not to write that paper and concentrate on the other 4 papers. When I went to collect the hall ticket one week before the exam, the person in the institute said you have already paid for this paper. Why don't you just go and attempt the paper. I took it as a prompt from Baba. Went home and kept the hall ticket in the Paduga during bhajan.

Last bhajan was going on --- Bhajo bhajo seetharam --- GC singing and the whole place was charged with vibrations and I was sitting next to him plump in front of SWAMY's chair. The paduga was placed on top of the foot rest for SWAMY. Suddenly the hall ticket flew and bounced ( I have never seen sheet of paper bouncing in my life before) fell near my leg. I knew then very much that HE is taking care of my exam. Dr said I will read that paper MS 5 and explain what is written there. We will allocate two days for that paper. Rest is with SWAMY. I said game and we did go through that paper only for 3 days totally. When results came I got overall 60% for MS 5 , I cleared my Economics arrears with 60% + and Information technology also I cleared in first class. MS 8 where I spent money I flunked. Not to mention Kandaswamy family migrated to Canada just after that results , Mr Babu who taught me economics had to leave that job as he had some problems in office.

My next semester had one macro economics and this MS 8 arrear started bothering me. But I decided to go ahead with other papers and write this later. This time I collected my hall ticket and kept it in SWAMY's padam and honestly I was expecting a sign from HIM that HE will be with me and write the exam. This time the sweet LORD chose to show me a different sign. I bought 4 pens and kept it along with the hall ticket. Bhajan was going on and last but one song another brother was singing. I was again sitting right in front of SWAMY. Suddenly two pens came tumbling down and fell near my leg. I separated those pens and used it for that semester. Only HE knows why the first pen I started using never went dry. I used only one pen for the whole 4 papers. With SWAMY's grace I cleared all the papers with excellent grades some I got distinction and some I got first class.

Time was up for the next semester where I decided to write my macro economics along with my regular papers. I was wondering what to do. Then Mr Babu who left Qatar for good came on a visit to search for a job and he was more than willing to spend time with me though he was really running around to meet people to somehow get a job. I got the hall ticket and this time no signs as I had 1 unused pen and some from the old pen blessed by BABA. So exams were great and cleared all the papers with excellent grades. You may be wondering what happened to Mr Babu. His role was over so he left for India as he did not get any placement. Even today he is in Mumbai or Gujarat somewhere happily.

My last chance for appearing for MS 08 came in that semester . Just the thought of writing that exam was a nightmare. Just then a devotee who came from Bahrain I suppose Mr Vanchinath said he is too good in statistics and he can teach me that subject. He was really too good. I have never seen anybody teaching like that in my life. He could make me do problems in probability / sampling etc with ease. I prayed to Baba intensely and told HIM this is my last chance. I am not capable of writing this paper ( any paper for that matter) So please be with me and write this paper. If I don't get through this paper all my dream and hard earned money will be down the drain. HE knew everything still its my responsibility to remind HIM. I wrote the paper not so good as it was very tough and I prayed to HIM after coming home fell and hugged HIS chair visualizing HIS soft warm lap and cried. Reminded HIM about HIS capability to change my answers before it reaches the evaluators. HE is so compassionate that HE can never see any tears in anybody's eyes. HE knew my plight andso when I got my results I cleared the exam.
Of course Mr. Vanchinath was blessed with a superb offer in Sharjah and left Qatar for good immediately after the results.

The final hurdle for my MBA had to be crossed. I must swear and acknowledge Mr Walter Dias, a friend who was the, Marketing Manager of Gulf Air took so much of time to help me with my project and became my mentor. My thesis was hanging and 4 times my project proposal was rejected by the University and I changed the topic two times. Then I met my friend who was working as a Sales Manager in Coco cola handling Arwa mineral water Mr Murali Kamat. I told him about my plight and he suggested why don’t you do a project about Arwa mineral water and its success in the market, readily offering help. So I took the project Marketing Strategies of Arwa Mineral Water – A case study Report with a business model for new entrants to the market. He took me to Mr Nadeem Khan his Regional Head from Pakistan. We had a discussion and Mr Nadeem gave a letter to the University acknowledging his consent and gave all support. I submitted a detailed research methodology and the project proposal was instantly approved. I completed the project in 3 months and I sent it to the University. It was approved and I got 5 out of 5 points.

Again I want to share with you it was HE who was doing everything as I got my results I came to know that Murali Kamath had been transferred to Bahrain and Nadeem Khan has migrated to Canada. Walter Dias resigned from Gulf Air and joined Qatar Insurance heading a new Division independently. Looking back I see all the people who was sent by SWAMY did their roles very well and they have been blessed by HIM with better positions outside Doha. Thus SWAMY blessed me with an MBA.
Meanwhile we were doing so many programmes for SWAMY on every festivals. I want to narrate some magnificent incidents. We as group ( we are not part of the official SSSSO) is headed by Dr. Malini Chandrasekharan and Mr Chandrasekharan and we are a like minded people of about 50 members. Just the love of SWAMY brought us together they have been running a group for more than 15 years perhaps and doing phenomenal service activities along with EHV.

The new SOS shrine The main activity is EHV started humbly with 9 children , I believe , and today we have 7 centres, 25 teachers and 200 children. Truly SWAMY ’s angels and they are doing many many service activities following the foot steps of Swamy. Once we had a pooja they put a jasmine flower garland on two photos of identical sizes and that night we had unusual fragrance in the pooja room. Next morning we saw on one photo the garland has grown substantially and the other photo it was the same size.

Immediately we took a photo and went to the studio. But the photo did not come. Then we came back and prayed to Swamy this is not for publicity purposes and we wanted to be sure of HIS presence. Then we took the photo again and it came. So we held a special bhajan to cheer SWAMY’s presence. We have made a baby Jhoola (swing) where we decorate it with SWAMY ‘s picture ( reclining position) and we use it on SWAMY’s birthday in the morning and evening. A devotee who did not have any issues for 7 years was swinging the jhoola and she conceived immediately after that to everyone’s surprise. This jhoola has repeated the performance and we have 3 instances of devotees blessed with babies. One of them was a EHV teacher who did not have any possibility clinically and all astrologers who saw the horoscope ruled out any possibility of a second issue for her. Even her first child’s horoscope reveals only single child though both the parents wanted a second one. But SWAMY sees only what work we are doing for HIM. Against all odds they came for the Birthday bhajan hearing about the wonder Jhoola and their faith did not go waste. They were blessed with a baby girl recently.

One day in 2003 may be before Christmas I was taking bath before the bhajan and suddenly I started getting a song .. Hanumantaraya namo, Jaya hanuman satya sai namo--- I repeated the words and the tune again and again so that I don’t forget the song. Then I realised it was in sindu bharavi one of my favourite raga. I remember then way back in 1991 or 1992 when I met my family friend Harihara Krishnan and I was explaining a phase of my life to him and said this Krishna or Vishnu troubles me a lot. But Shiva is very considerate. I am lover of mother form. After the nice time we had together I came down and picked up my Yamaha bike and started heading home suddenly I got a song and I was singing govardana giri dhari murare –I checked with my friend and he said it appears like charukesi or kalavathi or something. That was my first song I ever got. But after a decade now Hanumantaryanamo was the second song.
Now 2005 before I left for vacation I was sitting in the shrine with the harmonium and I got a song KARUNAMAI SAI MAA—It Was melodious Thank you Sai Ma you are really karunamayi. Then the thought came why I shouldn’t produce a CD for HIS 80th Birthday. I cannot do Yagna (haven) but atleast this I can do… likea small squirrel in sethu bandhanam ( building bridge for Sai Rama). That was the beginning of the CD project.I was suppose to sing another song for Ganesh and I felt we are doing first project and I did not want to start a ganesh bhajan in Suba bandu varali. So I prayed to SWAMY to give me a bright song and this song came when I was again taking bath Gauri nandana gajavadana. Followed by Sai Mukunda Janardana and Karunantha Sai. Thus the project took shape and went for recording. I sent a SMS about the title of the CD Karunantha Sai but my dear DR & GC was not happy about the title. They wanted something more. I prayed to HIM again and then the title emerged Prana Sakha...........

(......the journey continues)

Author is A EHV guru and a Bhajan Singer. An ardent devotee of Bhagwan Sri Sathya Sai Baba.
Submitted to: Sai Baba Of India